Thoughts on startups by investors that
fund them & entrepreneurs that run them

What is the worst startup pitch ever?

Take your choice (these are both real, honest-to-God pitches, and I’ve got the originals in my possession):

Contestant A
CluelessCo is an internet startup company seeking $2 million of equity financing to fund our company for at least one year. CluelessCo will become the main consumer outlet for the internet, digital cable and satellite TV, and cell phones and PDAs.

To this date, no company has been able to take control of the internet as a whole because no company has been able to develop a customer base that is loyal enough to pursue the majority of their internet needs through one company. The reason for this is none of the established companies designed their business to obtain a truly loyal customer base. We believe we will obtain a loyal customer base that will allow us to establish a strong position as the preferred customer portal.

There are 4 main competitors to our business: (1) MSN, (2) Yahoo, (3), Google, and (4) Amazon. These companies do not have a loyal customer base, leaving an opportunity for our company.

Contestant B
A Software-as-a-Service company using open source and cloud computing technologies. Software will be created in these 6 different areas:

  1. Browser-based operating system
  2. Web-based Productivity Applications
  3. Department-level Business Applications
  4. Web-based Messaging & Collaboration Application
  5. Web-based Database Management System
  6. All applications will are web-based

 

*original post can be found on Quora @ : http://www.quora.com/David-S-Rose/answers *

Written by David S. Rose

user David S. Rose Founder and CEO,
Gust

David has been described as "the Father of Angel Investing in New York" by Crain's New York Business, & a "world conquering entrepreneur" by BusinessWeek. He is a serial entrepreneur & Inc 500 CEO who chairs New York Angels, one of the most active angel investment groups. David is also CEO of Gust.

prev next

You might also be interested in

From Accelerators to Venture Capital: What is best for your startup?

With startup growth up 61% since 2014 and more investment programs emerging, it can be overwhelming for founders to know just where to jump in. As the most startup-friendly accelerator on the planet, MassChallenge has helped 835 startup companies around the world, who have raised over $1.1 billion in funding and created over 6,500 jobs. We have seen startups at

Read more >

Ask A Founder: Startup Lessons Learned from Work Truck Solutions’ Kathryn Schifferle

Kathryn Schifferle, Founder and CEO of Work Truck Solutions, turned being a woman in work trucks into an oversubscribed $2.1 million round.

We sat down with Kathryn as she shared what her fundraising journey was like, the startup lessons she learned, and her advice to fellow founders, especially women. Here is what she had to say:

HK: Tell

Read more >

Valuation Part I: Peeling the Onion, or How Top Investors Value the Startups They Invest In

Early-stage technology company valuations are generally a crap-shoot. Bill Payne did a great post about this in October 2011. This post builds on top of his work, and attempts to shed additional light on the valuation process.

New founders may think that startup valuations work like this:

I figure out what the value of my existing company is I figure

Read more >

Ask A Founder: Startup Lessons Learned from Squareknot’s Jason Rappaport

Jason Rappaport, Founder and CEO of Squareknot, has raised $1.3 million to date — his first $500,000 round came after a single email, pitch, and lunch.

We sat down with Jason as he shared what his fundraising journey was like, the startup lessons he learned, and his advice to fellow founders. Here is what he had to say:

HK: Tell

Read more >

Ask A Founder: Startup Lessons Learned from Planitar’s Kevin Klages

Kevin Klages, Co-Founder and CEO of Planitar, raised a $500,000 seed round after four pitches to angel investors.

We sat down with Kevin as he shared what his fundraising journey was like, the startup lessons he learned, and his advice to fellow founders. Here is what he had to say:

HK: Tell me a little about Planitar. How

Read more >

Comments