What is the worst startup pitch ever?

David S. Rose
David S. Rose , Founder and CEO , GUST INC.
10 Aug 2014

Take your choice (these are both real, honest-to-God pitches, and I’ve got the originals in my possession):

Contestant A
CluelessCo is an internet startup company seeking $2 million of equity financing to fund our company for at least one year. CluelessCo will become the main consumer outlet for the internet, digital cable and satellite TV, and cell phones and PDAs.

To this date, no company has been able to take control of the internet as a whole because no company has been able to develop a customer base that is loyal enough to pursue the majority of their internet needs through one company. The reason for this is none of the established companies designed their business to obtain a truly loyal customer base. We believe we will obtain a loyal customer base that will allow us to establish a strong position as the preferred customer portal.

There are 4 main competitors to our business: (1) MSN, (2) Yahoo, (3), Google, and (4) Amazon. These companies do not have a loyal customer base, leaving an opportunity for our company.

Contestant B
A Software-as-a-Service company using open source and cloud computing technologies. Software will be created in these 6 different areas:

  1. Browser-based operating system
  2. Web-based Productivity Applications
  3. Department-level Business Applications
  4. Web-based Messaging & Collaboration Application
  5. Web-based Database Management System
  6. All applications will are web-based

 

*original post can be found on Quora @ : http://www.quora.com/David-S-Rose/answers *

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